What ever happened to Xine’s Tree?

So I was flipping through a magazine today and they had a page of photos of Twilight-themed goods available to buy online. One of these was a wall transfer that said:

It wasn't quite the same as this particular decoration, as it was in gothic script and had the '...' after 'Edward,' but this one is close enough.

 Yep. “I’m just a Bella, waiting for my Edward…” Oh how I lolled.

So I got to thinking about Twilight, which led to thought on vampires in general, and then I came across a general vampire meme, and I thought: I need to blog about this. So here we go, Ace’s Vampire Meme.

Ace’s Vampire Meme!

Why do you think people are fascinated by vampires?

The thing about vampires is that they appeal to our subconscious. People often associate vampire with death, or with sex, but it’s more than that. Vampires are dead, powerful, faster and stronger than us, dangerous, and often gorgeous and alluring.  They appeal to people because they’re like we are, only better. They’re also the perfect predator. Vampires represent the mysterious, the erotic, the dangerous. They’re all about the repressed or the darker side of our psyche. They’re dangerous, alluring, sexually desirable and aware, near-invulnerable, and they can do anything they like without fear of the consequences. They appeal to us because they are an outlet for all the things in our subconscious that we cannot let out.  In the past 15-20 years there’s been a lot of tortured-soul vampire stuff; from Angel in Buffy or Edward Cullen from Twilight to name the two most well-known examples; and that’s another aspect that appeals to people. Lots of people have some dark secret, some dilemma or addiction that is mucking up their life, and that’s what the ‘vampire as a tortured soul’ stuff really is. It’s a metaphor. So much vampire stuff is a metaphor for something.

 Coolest vampire stuff out there?

Well, obviously Buffy has to be on this list, which in a way is kind of a shame, because it deviates quite a bit from the established vampire mythos of pop culture. Vampires as soulless, ugly demons? Who steal their names from Doctor Who and look like Dark Lords from Harry Potter, only less cool? (You don’t know what I’m talking about, check out this guy. Totally Voldemort with a nose. And with no fashion sense, obviously.) All the same, Buffy is nonetheless a good show and doubtless reinvigorated the vampire mythos for a new decade and a new generation.

My personal favorite part of the vampire pop culture is the Betsy Taylor series of novels by MaryJanice Davidson, about a blonde valleygirl-type airhead who dies and wakes up Queen of the Vampires, much to her horror and dismay. The earlier ones are strongly comic supernatural romance, but the later ones are a lot stronger on plot and a little bit darker as Betsy reluctantly takes on the responsibility of being the Queen.

Finally, Carpe Jugulum (‘Seize the Jugular?’) by Terry Pratchett is awesome, for parodying the vampire genre even as it tells a great story. 

 Since everyone is asking this question; Team Edward or Team Jacob?

*frowny face* Honestly, I don’t particularly like either of them. Let’s go Team Alice. She’s bouncy and fun and slightly eccentric, and the actress who plays her in the movie is pretty, and hot.

Favorite vampire stereotype?

The true predatorial vampires, that is the dangerous killers vs. seducer type, probably, and the ‘Gothic Lolita’ female vampire you see a lot in manga; that is, flirty and feminine and kind of goth, but with frills and lace and cuteness. If they’ve combined gothic vampire dress with cute feminine dress and hairstyle, it’s probably a ’Gothic Lolita’ vampire.

A sketch of a 'Gothic Lolita' vampire... is it just me, or does she look vaguely like Britney Spears?

Currently in the life of Ace…

14:51 I think I mighta mispelled my username… I did it from memory…

14:51 It means ‘Ace is in the house.’

14:52 @neilhimself Reading Maddy’s posts on your account was hilarious

14:53 Question: Is crime scene forensics a bad subject to do if you have an acute sense of smell? Discuss.

14:57 "Does somebody want to tell me why a hotel guest is serving customers? I warned you we’d be busy with that sissy writer thing in town!" LOL!

14:58 Thank you MaryjaniceDavidson for that quote. [maryjanicedavidson.blogspot.com/2009/10/i-carve-for-elderly.html]

15:11 Came across "Twitterature" [mashable.com/2009/06/23/twitterature/] today.It’s a set of classic books in 20 tweets or less.Oddly funny

15:12 @neilhimself hey, found "Twitterature" today.It’s a set of classic books in 20 tweets or less mashable.com/2009/06/23/twitterature/

Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter

I’m a pretty big fan of author MaryJanice Davidson. She writes hilarious, engaging stories in the supernatural genre about, among other things, a reluctant valleygirl-turned-vampire-queen that I love half to death. She has a blog, on writing and on Real Life, which I check out every now and then. (My life, it is inexplicably busy.)

Anyway, I came across this post, on what can happen when your hotel staff are busy. It’s hysterical. You should read it.

I’m thinking about doing the unit on crime scene forensics next semester. (In America that stuff is done by forensic anthropologists, but out here it’s archaeologists who do the forensic work.) It’s definitely one I’d like to do. I’ve always found that sort of thing really interesting. I haven’t done the base level practical unit for this course yet though, and I’m wondering how necessary it is. Is it vital? I have a lowering suspicion that it is. Also, I have a very acute sense of smell. It’s not as sensitive as it was when I was a child – I used to be able to smell ants, for example; apparently it’s the formic acid; they stink, by the way – but on the other hand it’s far more discerning. In the past I’ve been able to walk into a room and tell that someone has injured themselves by the faint smell of blood. Needless to say, I’m not entirely sure that working, in any capacity, within the vicinity of dead people is the best idea… I’d like to find out, though.

I don’t have to make a decision until February, but still, it’s bugging me.

I do know however, that I will be studying Latin. I’ve already got the texts and did some of the exercises on the way home on the train the other day. As I suspected, Latin is fun. Also, nice and logical.

So a year and several months ago, after difficulty after difficulty, I had to to go through a rather unpleasant process which ended with my writing this distraught post. Everything in it was honestly true at the time.

The thing is, when you admit something, to yourself and to others, you finally get a chance to look at it clearly. And when you’re not trying to walk around the elephant in the room like it’s not there, and not trying to constantly cover up and do things you are hopelessly incapable of, you find, all of a sudden, that you are doing things at your level, and you can do them.

And you think.

Sometimes, you can come to conclusions that you might have come to years ago if only you hadn’t been so busy denying parts of yourself.

July this year I made a sudden leap. I did what I’d always wanted to do, and enrolled in archaeology via a BA.  My grade 12 score was good, and there were vacant places in the course, so I was mildly surprised to end up taking classes at the best university in the state within two weeks of deciding to go for it. Surprised, but very pleased.

I’ve been working like crazy, but it has paid off. My mind has been switched on like a lightbulb, for the first time in years. I love what I’m doing. And best of all, I’m succeeding. I thought I didn’t have a chance at anything, but I found that when I’m dedicated, I can do things. Sure I’m only doing it part-time, and I’ve been requiring a lot of leeway at home, but I’m doing well! I just finished my last exam, but I have solidly passed one subject, and I went into my final exam knowing that I would pass in that subject no matter how I did in the exam, because of how well I was doing for the subject.

I’m happy. I have a future. I feel great, and I just wanted to share it with everyone who was kind enough to console me after I wrote last year’s post. I found something I love and I’m good at, and apparently when something meets those criteria, I can do it.

I got this idea from Belle de Jour’s blog. It seemed cool enough, so yeah. The meme evolves into a new form. (She still uses Blogspot, bless her. I left that one half a decade ago. WordPress is way more awesome. *totally unnecessary plug*)

I can’t believe I’m going to try to limit it to five things I like, since I am a Certified Geek Girl (I object to the term ‘chick,’ for philosophical reasons) and have a peculiar affinity to tech. Anyway:

Five things I dislike about technology:

• LISP dialect: Scheme. Programming language from hell, aka the Final Straw That Finally Made Me Quit Trying To Study I.T. as a Career. (Computers are fun as a hobby, but not as a life choice.)  Oh, how I hate it. It’s a monster. More specific, language-based languages like Basic are okay, but Scheme? It’s over thirty years old, and it is nothing like the current languages. Sure, it’s dynamic and easy to use if you can grasp it, and no one wants a repeat of some of the Y2K problems, but it’s a horrendous thing to inflict on a first year IT student. The class had a 70-80% fail rate. I’ve more or less quit ranting about it by now – it’s been, like, four years – but I still hate it passionately.
• The fact that on the web, nothing is private and nobody is truly anonymous. If you’re skilled enough, you can grab important, basic details about people and use them against them. It’s not especially hard. I find that scary, and it’s only going to get worse.
• There’s so much junk clogging the net and obscuring the awesome stuff.
• The technology is beginning to evolve faster than I am. I used to keep up with its changes effortlessly, but since computer-geekery became a hobby instead of a way of life, I’ve lost a little bit of my instant adaptability. I actually passed up the opportunity to get a new phone to replace my years-old chunky one because I tohught the new ones were a bit fussy. (Of course, that decision lasted only until I saw the Sony Walkman phone. Instant tech lust.)
• That the truly awesome stuff costs more money than  have.

Five things I like about technology:

• The internet. My life would be an empty, sad shell without the internet. I use it to connect with people, and I use it constantly to learn. I am on a never-ending quest to learn new things, and the internet’s like the never ending bag of Unexpected Awesomeness. You get a lot of unexpected totally-uncoolness, but hey, you gotta take the bad with the good.
• My mp3 player. Music I can take with me! And it’s so easy to use, and to carry around!
• Lego Batman, Star Wars:Racer and Sonic the Hedgehog. Because they rock the casbah.
• It makes life more complicated, but also more interesting. I read a thing by a scientist where he asserted that through the constant pressure to adapt to new technologies that we are putting ourselves through, we are actually putting great evolutionary pressure upon ourselves and are forcing ourselves to evolve more quickly. I don’t know if it’s true, but it helps life stop getting stale and unchanging.
• Man, does it help with uni work! I can just download lecture notes, enroll online, spare my lecturers my infamous handwriting…

Note: So I’ve been hopelessly busy, but a few months back I wrote this smashing article called Sociability and Aspergers discussing, among other things, the damage the ‘loner’ stereotype can cause. Wouldn’t you know, I finally have time to type it up, and I can’t find it. So in the meantime, check this one out.

What they have to do with one another and how this relates to Aspergers, as well as why it’s important.

I never blushed until I was almost eighteen.

I used to feel very complacent about the fact that I never blushed when I was embarrassed. So you can imagine my horror when all of a sudden, I began to blush fierily. A poker face is no good if it’s a bright red one.  I wondered for a long time why I began blushing so late in life, until it dawned on me: I still never blush when I’m embarrassed. I blush when I feel decidedly self-conscious.

Read about autism or Aspergers at all, and you will soon come across what is referred to as Theory of Mind. It’s usually explained in very simplistic terms as the understanding that other people are separate from you, and have thoughts and feelings of their own. The problem with this explanation is that it is very basic; theory of mind is more complex than that. Asperger people often have diminished theory of mind; it is not a matter of whether they do or don’ t have it, but to what degree. It is compatarively easy tro grasp that another person has thoughts and feelings separate from yours, but the more complex aspects – the ‘put yourself in their shoes’ and work out what they might be feeling part – is much harder.

More on that later.

So where do embarrassment and self-consciousness come into this?

To my mind, embarrassment is all about you, and realising you’ve made a fool of yourself, but self-consciousness is an awareness that other people are monitoring you and making judgements about you, and an awareness of the kind of judgements they might be making.

A rather illustrative example of low self-consciousness occurs in an episode of Doctor Who. (Bear with me here.) The Doctor and Rose, while investigating alien activity, go into a stranger’s house to ask them  questions about strange incidents occurring in the area. The Doctor notices a jar of jam on a table top, and promptly scoops some of the jam out of the jar using his fingers, while Rose watches appalled. He is not censoring his actions out of awareness that he is being watched and judged he is cheerfully oblivious.

Everyone is naturally self-conscious to one degree or another; it is only when we are acutely so that it becomes a problem. To be self-conscious to a normal degree however, you need to have a fairly complex theory of mind. Thus, it was only when I had finished school and began interacting more broadly with people that I developed my inclination to blush, because until then my natural level of self-consciousness was much lower.

I feel that it is important for people to understand this effect of diminished theory of mind, because it affects social interactions. If you do not understand how people judge your actions or why, or how they react to your percieved intent, then you may behave in an eccentric or offensive way without even realising it. This more subtle aspect of Aspergers often escapes people and exacerbates difficulties particularly in social situations, because people operate under a certain set of assumptions regarding another’s theory of mind – that they understand how their actions are viewed and recieved by others, etc. It is especially important for carers to understand this, as they may need to explain why it is so important to brush your hair every morning or  can’t burst into song in a public place, for example, or why fashion sense is important. It is also important for an Aspergers person’s friends to understand this, so that they realise that their Asperger friend does not necessarily mean offence, and if they accidentally offend them to explain what they did wrong. (Because you know, the ‘what did I do??’  ‘Oh, like you don’t know!‘ conversation is one of the most frustrating ones in existence. Seriously people, if we had a clue, we wouldn’t be asking.)

Hope this helps people.

So I was looking at the subject profiles for the archaeology course at my university.

Budding archaeologists at my uni are trained at something called the Teaching Archaelogical Research Discipline In Simulation site, which is generally known by its acronym.

Thus I came across this on the uni website:

And of course, this being a top university the TARDIS site is, indeed, peopled with a Doctor or two…

Week Three.

Ancient History

I was reading Livy in research for my essay, when I came across this particular quote.

 Hasdrubal had sent for him by letter, when scarce yet arrived at manhood; and the matter had even been discussed in the senate, the Barcine faction using all their efforts, that Hannibal might be trained to military service and succeed to his father’s command.

Hanno, the leader of the opposite faction, said, “Hasdrubal seems indeed to ask what is reasonable, but I, nevertheless, do not think his request ought to be granted.”  When he had attracted to himself the attention of all, through surprise at this ambiguous opinion, he proceeded:

“Hasdrubal thinks that the flower of youth which he gave to the enjoyment of Hannibal’s father, may justly be expected by himself in return from the son: but it would little become us to accustom our youth, in place of a military education, to the lustful ambition of the generals.”

[Livy Book 21, ch.3, 1-4]

So in other words, according to Livy, the general Hasdrubal offered Hannibal military training because he wanted to shag him, which Hannibal’s father had apparently done to him. The mind boggles.  It’s enough to give you culture shock.

Archaeology.

Our proper lecturer was back this week, from where he’d been. He proved to be enthusiastic about the subject, rambling around it and telling us all kinds of neat things, and making terrible puns. (*displays photograph of a body preserved in a peat bog* “…and here we have Mr Pete Marsh…”)

“Thisis my fourth year lecturing – it feels like it’s about my 14th or 15th year, but I am reliably informed that it is my fourth,” he said after introducing himself.

He went on to show us photographs of some of the stuff he’d been up to in Europe and Turkey.

“Because I’m an archaeologist, that means by nature I’m perverse. I went out into this dusty bit where no one ever wants to go.”

He brought up a photo of a bunch of people in shirts with the uni logo dancing.

“The site’s actually run by some Japanese people, and they’re really into kareoke. There’s not really much point to that, except to show am embarrassing photo.”

Later on, in the actual lecture, he showed us a photo of a pot painstakingly reconstructed from broken shards glued together.

“What can you tell me about this pot?” he asked us.

There was a long silence.

“It’s broken?” a student offered.

And that’s about it for week 3.